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Quotes /Jokes

I’m seriously sick, Lab result shows that I have Moneylaria,
I need Alertcitamol, Datatrocine and Airtimecloroqun to be healed.

You’re traveling to fornicate / steal / kill and you’re praying for journey mercy. Nothing Jesus wouldn’t see for prayer department.

If your Ex call by 2am saying he can’t sleep , just tell him to read
ISAIAH 48:28
there is no rest for the wicked.

To those who smile during the day and cry at night, may God grant you peace in Jesus name Amen

My mum kept fish on the table I ate the fish,now she asking to check under the table to know if any rat is dead.

Restaurant should create room where people can go and chew bone. I am tired of pretending please.

If i mistakenly send to you my account number what will you do as a good person you are?

The beauty of a woman is perfectly revealed when her man is responsible,
irresponsible husband destroys a virtuous wife!

Many Divorced Women Are Living In Regrets,
Please Protect Your Marriage With Total Submission To Your Husband.
Truth is bitter.

You can’t cook and you want to get married. What will your wife eat when she comes back from work late?

I finally discovered I’m related to Dangote. His father and my father are fathers.

Some ladies have been cooking for their guys for 5yrs now and the only Assurance they get is any man that will marry you will enjoy you.

Don’t just be tall for nothing, help us look into 2021 and tell us whether is safe because we getting closer.

Face masks don’t allow person see fine guys and girls for church again.

The Reason Why you are Scammed Online is Because You Are Looking For Fast Cash, Wealth Don’t Happen in One Week. You Build Wealth.

Do you know a lady can kneel down apologise, cry, faint and still be lying??
I am not a preacher of love.

Imagine if girls start doing rituals like boys. They don’t need to use iPhone or Benz to lure guys. All they need to say is, baby come to my house, I am home alone.
No guy will remain in this world.

After S*X she walked to the mirror and said
” QUEEN MOTHER IT’S DONE”
As a man what will you do
❓❓❓

If your relationship is not working, try other ‘ship’ like Entrepreneurship or Workmanship! You can’t be lonely and broke at the same time.

Dear Married Men, Stop Telling other ladies that You’re not Happy in your Marriage While your Wife Keeps Getting Pregnant for you.
I am not a preacher of love.

Warning!!!
Don’t trust a guy that can insert sim properly into a phone in the dark.
He can surely rape.

The Only Role We Have On Your Wedding Is To Eat, Drink, Snap And Dance. If You Like Take Loan Or Use Your Life Savings To Impress Us.
i am going.

The way I enjoyed gist for inside bus eeeh.. I don’t think I’m buying my own car next week again .

David killed Goliath
Sampson killed lion
I killed mosquito
What do you killed?

Everything in Nigeria is Connection, including Hatred.. Someone will just hate you through someone without any reason. I am not a preacher of love

If not poverty, what else would make someone argue that OK cloth is better than a new one?

If a tall girl is called Tolani,
And a Fat girl is called
Fatimo, even skinny girl called sikira.
What should we now call a short girl?

Sir did your wife told you she was coming to FESTAC today?Well she is here!With one boy! Inside his house for long now!

If people can “Easily” differentiate between your maid and your kids, you’re a very wicked person.
Should I Continue or Mind my Business?

Have you noticed those guys that plays church instruments on Sunday, they don’t give offering?

Is not that I am not missing her oo, but if I call now, her cream will finish, her data will finish and her hair will be old .
I am tired oooooh.

Please do we still have guys like Joseph,who saw the nakedness of a woman and ran away.
Like I did yesterday…..

Stupidity is when a single lady is faithful to a married man .
I am not a preacher of love.

Seek first her account number and her phone number will be added unto you….
Ladies am I communicating
Should I increase it.

What most ladies are praying for is just
a Wedding, to shame their village people
and Friends, not “MARRIAGE” itself.
I am going…

Brother just because a pretty girl newly pack to your street you start wearing suit to fetch water .
Something is telling me that most guys reading this are doing like that.

Being single is not easy ooooo.sometimes I throw pillow at myself and say “Baby stop naa, I am tired please….

DON’T BE IN COMPETITION WITH ANYBODY,IF LAND FINISH,WE would BUY HOUSE..

You are feeling happy and you are tagging me with 38 others,are you crazy? Did I tell you that i am feeling Happy also?

Hmm I can never forget the day my mom drank hot tea when I was still in her womb… I nearly faint that day.

Question of the Day:

Can you trust a Nurse who’s Husband sells coffin?

When rain stops, the owner of umbrella will know that he or she is carrying load,this life did not balance at all.

The most dangerous bondage in life is your inability to say no when necessary.

Have you ever gone to call your babe for outing,and her father came out?
share your experience!

I think married men should start wearing uniform because rings are not working again.

Wife no scarce, some guys are busy looking for a God fearing Nicki Minaj with a touch of Cardi B in Chioma Jesus..

WIFE NO SCARCE OO!
YOU’RE THE ONE LOOKING FOR GOD FEARING NICKY MINAJ WITH RIHANNA TOUCH IN CHIOMA JESUS.

What will you do if the one who Broke your heart
Is the only one who can fix it ?

The only Proverb my Grandpa told me before he died
WHEN THE WEATHER IS COLD NO WOMAN IS UGLY.

Dating a married man is like driving a government car, it will never be yours…

Solve this Maths:
If ‘C’ is found in NNPC, NDDC, NCDC, PHCN, POLICE, APC, PRESIDENCY and EFCC.
It seems C is Nigeria Problem.
What is C?

You can never know the real meaning of setback until you go into relationship with a jobless lady with high taste.

As a visitor, is it right to ask for another plate of food? Please reply me fast am in someone’s house before I disgrace my village people.

Appreciate those who gossip about you.
It’s not easy for someone to leave their problems and carry yours on their head!

I Wonder Why A Guy Will Wear Polo 8k Trouser 13k Shoe 20k. Just To Impress A Girl Wearing Leggies Of 200naira With No Pant!
Lol Hahahahaha..

If one boyfriend can make you happy, imagine having five.

Marriage is not about wearing matching outfits.
Do you have matching hearts, matching brains and matching understanding?

People insult and look down on you, because you don’t have money. Your younger siblings have lost all respect for you, as the first son/daughter, because you don’t have money. I wish the universe will favor you and ultimately turn your life around.

Stop mocking people. Try to control yourself when the urge to mock others come, this life is deeper than you know. A poor man today, can be a rich man tomorrow. Stop mocking people. You are destroying yourself indirectly, but you don’t know.

Learn to separate the MAN from the boys. Not all of them with prick, are real men. Some destroy. Just as he is gaining a good thing, you are also getting a good thing, it should be vice-versa. Make sure the one you decide to be with, is worthy.

Telling a girl to go and hustle, because they don’t have a job or something doing, it’s like pushing prostitution to them. Leave them alone, if you can’t sponsor them to better their lives. Stop putting more pressure on them. Wonderful!…

By Obaino style blog

News*sports*fashion*life style*business*jokes/videos*books*rumors*videos*health*education*religious*winks

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